Reflection

Well, this semester is just about over. It seems to me that this year has gone by both extremely fast and slow. When I think about this semester I feel like it has gone by so fast, like we started a month ago, but then I think about last semester and it feels like it was forever ago. This semester in English has been a fun time. I have enjoyed the class as a whole and from what I hear from my friends in other English classes this was by far the best one. I feel that through out the semester we have all been able to grow as a physical community. When we first started I felt like I wouldn’t get to know very many people but I feel like we have a very wide variety of people in our class but all of us were able to connect in one way or another. In the essay written by Barlow, he writes, “the necessary elements of community include a culture, a religion sorts, a sense of necessity, and most importantly shared adversity.” I think that the most applicable part of that sentence is the part about shared adversity. There were probably times, situations, and assignments where some of us felt more comfortable than others, but that enabled us to know each other better as the year went on. I know for a fact that there were times that I was put outside of my comfort zone and forced to make something of it. I felt that way a lot when it came to the blogging assignment. I went back and forth a lot throughout the assignment constantly changing my mind on whether or not I enjoyed the assignment. Today’s society is SO centered on technology and cyberspace but I however do not feel like I completely fit with the cyberspace (mainly because half the time I don’t know how to work the computers). Being on cyberspace allows you to be either yourself more comfortably, or to be somebody you wish you were. Although, that may make you feel more comfortable in yourself, it is creating in you a false sense of security. I know that in the beginning of the blogging assignment I was uncomfortable. I thought “I don’t want people to read what I have to say…. and I don’t even know what I want to say, nobody will care what I have to say.” When I originally started the assignment I was planning to talk about what I wanted to do in the future, and what my goals and aspirations were. However, I soon ran out of things to say and started using it as almost a weekly reflection about the past week of school and life in general. At times that made me uncomfortable, the fact that I was telling the whole class about what went on in my life the past week, because I am not one to freely express what I am feeling to every and any one. I usually only express my emotions to those close to me. The blogging assignment ended up going okay and I eventually became a little more comfortable with it, mainly because as I read other peoples I found that although we are all so different many of us had similar things to say or at least things that we could relate to. The blogging community was so different than any other cyber community I have experienced. I felt that it was exposing more of you to people that you may not know all that well, whereas in another cyber community such as facebook it feels more normal and comfortable because you have friendships and because it is so popular it makes you think that only those really close to you actually look at your profile. I felt that the blogging community and then physical class community were two completely different communities. It seemed that what happened within blogs usually stayed solely on the blog spot and didn’t really affect the physical community of the classroom. I realize that my thoughts are a little bit scattered but that is really how I feel about cyber communities, they cause a mix of feelings and emotions. I feel that it is not very normal to feel uncomfortable in a cyber community these days because they are slowly taking over the world. ☺ It is more common to send an email and keep in touch with people through the Internet than to use snail mail. However I really feel that the fact that cyber communities are growing so fast means that it is taking away the formality and importance of physical communities. I guess in short, depending on the situation and the mood I am in affects the comfortableness I feel within the cyber community.

Weekend Away

hey guys... well i am sitting here this sunday morning at the dinning room in my aunt and uncles house...i can hear my little cousins playing in the play room, everyone soon to be getting ready for church....but im sitting here writing my blog and trying again to get farther on my argument paper.... it has been so amazing to get away from school for the weekend and has giving me a little more energy to just finish the semester strong altho im not gonna lie... this paper is bringing me down a little bit... i feel like i am really struggling with it. Anyway enough with the down side...this weekend has been a blast :) Family is the most important thing to me and to be able to stay the weekend with my aunt uncle and cousins is such a blessing! on friday i got to go with my aunt to pick them up from school and they all showed me their classrooms. it made me wish again that i hadnt grown up because i miss elementary school!! then later that night we all packed up and headed to the baseball field and watched two baseball games...one for the youngest and one for the oldest cousin. then later on friday night after the games i got picked up by my sister-in-law who also came up from tucson for the weekend, and we went over to her friends house for a slumber-party!!! it was soo fun to stay up and visit with both of them :) then on saturday was the reason for my coming down to phoenix in the first place...my older brothers tennis match. he plays tennis for the u of a and they were playing asu for their last regular season match. my mom little brother and little sister all came up to watch too...(my dad had to work) :( but it was so good to spend the afternoon with my family and then go out to dinner to celebrate 2 birthdays... my little brother and my youngest cousin. now i am sitting here trying to get more of my paper done dreading going back to school but all in all this was an amazing weekend and i am so lucky to have such an amazing family...it wont be long till school is OVER!!!!!!!! hope you all had a good weekend and that your papers are going better than mine! see you all monday!

Birthday Bananza

Hello everyone...well im kinda slacking on things to talk about these days because there isnt really too much fun stuff goin on in my life right now...all it consists of is stressing out about all that has to be done in the next few weeks...but frankly im okay with that because the semester is ALMOST OVER!!!!!! and i can GO HOME!! but anyway dispite all the stuff i had to do this weekend i had a good amount of fun. Two of my friends has birthdays this weekend one yesterday and the other today so we spent alot of the weekend celebrating them!! a big group of us went out to dinner on friday night and then we watched a movie and hung out and laughed...and saturday we all went out again and then sunday we had a nice fancy birthday dinner in the UNION woot woot and then i watched father of the bride one and two and OMG I love those movies!! :) and then this morning we woke the birthday girl up briiiiiight and early and took her out to breakfast in her pj's and made her wear high heels!! these moments: spending the time doing crazy things are so much fun and the fact that these girls are all gonna be my friends for a verrrry long time if not the rest of my life...and i think that is really cool and that is what i really like about growing up and being here! :)
and then this thursday i am going to meet my family in phoenix and i am SOOOOOO excited to get out of here for a weekend!!! :) yay... okay so thats all i have to share for now but i hope you all had a great weekend!!

The Last Stretch...

Hey everyone...ugh im exhausted and i cant believe that it is sunday night already and we have school tomorrow!! im kinda feeling like the weeks are going slow and the weekends are flying by.. i am finding myself getting more and more antsy as the weeks...or i should say days go by... i feel like i have so much to do and so much to keep track of its wearing me out hahaha just the ideas and thoughts of all i have to do and the dates and deadlines i have to rememeber is making me more stressed then the actual work...if i can even sit down to do it.... i have never been much a procrastinator but boy oh boy these last few weeks of the semester are gonna be tough... i find myself being COMPLETELY unmotivated.... and its not good. as the days get closer and closer for me to go home for the summer i feel myslef losing focus more often :( but on a lighter note.... this weekend was pretty fun last night a few of my friends had what we like to call a "piercing party" hahaha from the name im sure you can guess what we did.....yup we all pierced our ears...we pierced our own ears!!! lol and it was such an adrenaline rush... altho to me it is always an adrenaline rush this piercing was the third time i have pierced myself and i love it...even tho i know my parents wont be too happy about it but still i just have to say that it is better than coming home with another tattoo!! :) now you can all see a bit of my rebellious side!! i hope everyone had a great weekend and has a good stressless week or as much a possible!

Past Few Weeks

Well... spring beak has come and gone... i dont know about anybody else but i feel like it went by wayyyyy too fast. i think it took me a while to realize that i was gonna be home for a week and not just the weekend! right before spring break i had my interview for my Athletic Training Program and i was so nervous to find out... i was supposed to find out right before spring break and i did... i GOT IN and i was so excited and relieved. i was thinking that if i hadn't gotten in it would have been the worst spring break ever.... i would have not wanted to come back up to school because i would not be able to progress in my major. But now that i am accepted i can move on and take the next step in achieving my life goal. im not gonna lie tho looking ahead to what the future holds is a bit overwhelming. i keep telling myself that it is only 4 more years and then im free to have a job and do what i love and what i love is definitely NOT homework and school hahaha i dont know about any of you but these last few weeks of the semester are gonna be rough!!! im trying to stay focused and on top of things but its like i have senioritus all over again!

HOME

Well... first of all i am realizing that my blogs are kinda steering away from my original idea of talking about what i wanna do and be when i grow up but now it is kinda just like a weekly journal...but i guess it is still just talking about how i am growing everyday and how i am coming closer and closer to who and what i am going to do and be for the rest of my life.
But this weeks is spring break and i am SOOO excited to be sitting in my house listening to my mom clean the kitchen, listening to my little sister practice her guitar and knowing my little brother is in his room....we just got back from my grandmas house (we went over there for dinner) and missing my dad tonight because he is at work today...my dad is a fire fighter so he is gone every other day for 24 hour shifts! :) but i just feel like it is so so so amazing to be home and know that i am home for an entire week! every time i come home it is like exactly as if i was never gone and i love it! i feel so fortunate that i can come home and absolutely love every second of being home...it gives me mixed emotions when i hear of people say that they cant wait to go back to flagstaff for school ( not to start school im sure but to just be on their own...away from their family) the being away from the family part makes me sad but i do sorta wish i could look forward to going back up and leaving the family....but it is SO hard for me to leave them EVVRY time....it never gets easier..... that is the part that makes me feel like i can never grow up because i absolutely hate leaving my family...i feel so empty without them.... so i guess i am just going to live every day this week and make each one as good as it can be and love every minute i have here!

Today

Today...right now... i am sitting on my bed eating breakfast checking my email and gonna be geting ready for church soon. i was checking my email and i had one from my little sister...she is 13 :) it always brightens my day when i hear from my family and the fact that my little sister so regularly emails me and make and effort to keep in touch with me and fill me in on what im missing at home makes my heart smile. it makes me realize that she misses me and i cant explain how amazing that makes me feel. this is the week before spring break and i am hoping that it doesnt go as slow as im thinking it will. it will be so amazing to be home in my house with my family for an ENTIRE WEEK!! it will be the first time this semester that i will be home.
so this weekend i had my interview for my athletic training program and i should find out tomorrow or tuesday whether i got it. i am very nervous because i want it so bad and if i get in then from here on is when i begin my journey for the rest of my life. it is going to be hard and extremely time consuming and im gonna love it! im so excited to find out what is going to happen!

Still Young

So i have been thinking a lot about where i am today and how life went so fast. When i was younger i remember that i couldn't wait to grow up. being a teenager would be so awesome and i was just so excited...kinda like the movie 13 going on 30...i hope that most or all of you have seen it and if you haven't i suggest you get on that its worth your time. :) but that is how i remember feeling in most of my younger years. However, now i feel like i am comparing my life to peter pan and i wish i could live in never never land and NEVER grow up. many would probably say that i am a sheltered child, and i can admit that YEAH! i was a bit sheltered while living at home, and still am now even though I'm living away from home on my own able to be free and branch out and do as i please... but i don't. i find myself living exactly as i would if i was still at home, going to bed at a reasonable time, going to all my classes, doing my homework, going to church regularly, and i still have yet to go to a party.... but i am totally okay with that. i think i realize how i was blessed with such an amazing family that i would never do anything that i think would disappoint them. Being away at college has forced me to grow up a lot but really to be honest... for having been away from home for almost a full school year...i still feel so young..and frankly I'm okay with that! :)

Looking Back...

I am a freshmen in college now and I find that I am constantly looking ahead and working for my future. I realize now that looking ahead and working towards things for my future is something that I have been doing since I was very little. Im sure that many of you might feel the same. as a child you always have dreams and goals that you want to achieve in your future. For me, as im sure most girls have, when i was young i dreamed that i was going to be a singer in a girl band with my elementary friends :) ...or maybe i am just making a fool of myself by admitting to that.... but anyway, I liked that idea until i realized that i am not musically talented hahaha. Also as a young girl i was always a tom boy and loved to play every and all sports and dreamed of becoming a pro sport athlete. as people grow up i feel like you go through many ideas of what you plan to do with the rest of your life and back then it is normal and okay. life goes by very fast and before you know it its time to make a real reational decision of what you want to do or be for the rest of your life. it is normal for college students to not know what they want to do with their life, and they change their major a few times before setteling down with one....or when they do pick one they just pick it because it sounds fun but they dont really think of what they will be able or want to do with that degree. I was lucky and was able to figure out what i wanted to do for the rest of my life when i was a freshmen in high school. I knew that ever since i was young i wanted to do something in the health field i dreamed of being a pediatrician but then decided that i wasnt into that many more years of schooling...but when i got to high school and was playing sports for school i became familiar with the athletic training profession. I was so excited because it was like the best of both worlds: i would be able to be around sports that i love for the rest of my life AND i would be helping/caring for people in the health field!! i was very excited and finally in my senior year of high school i was the student athletic trainer for my school and it was the best experience of my life. I KNEW that that was exactly what i wanted to do with my life. What i was wondering is if any of you dreamed of being something when you were younger and as you look at your life now...how have your desires changed?